I thought this was an awesome article!! Read the rest at kristensguide.com.
When it comes to appearances, if we have a positive body-concept, then we need to think about why we don’t feel that it is important that other people see our bodies the way we know our bodies should look like.
You will need a journal to do this since you actually need to write down your lists and such. Just thinking about them isn’t enough.
- Define Your Body-Concept
Make a list or draw a picture of what you think your body-concept is.DO NOT clip out photos of models in magazines! They aren’t you. You’re never going to look like them without extensive plastic surgery. Plus, there’s a very good chance that your body-concept is just as (if not more) attractive as that air-brushed model who spends the majority of the day focusing on looking good. One man’s idea of beauty is another man’s idea of ugly. - Recognize the Benefits
Make a list of all the benefits of using your body-concept to create your body-image, doing what it takes to make your body look like your healthy body-concept.Your body is a billboard, proudly displaying the message “I care about myself. I care about my family’s health. I want to be alive and vibrant for as long as possible because I love my kids, my partner, and my relatives and friends. I care about the tax-payers who would have to pay for my disabilities from obesity. I want my partner to have an attractive mate.”Your body is an example for others. “I got healthy, and you can too.”
It’s fun to be attractive, and it feels good when people respond to you because they think you’re attractive.
When you take time to look good for other people, it helps them feel important and respected. If you just go to your job interview in a pair of sweats, your potential boss is going to assume that you don’t think the she is important enough to dress up for, and she’ll probably decide not to hire you before you even say “Hello.” Likewise, if you go on your first date with Mister/Miss Right without brushing your hair or your teeth, they’re not going to feel like you really care about the date or them, so it would be doubtful that they would call you back.
- Recognize the Excuses
Make a list of all the reasons (excuses for) why you don’t invest the effort into changing your body to fit your body-concept.- “I don’t want to be one of those vain people who focus on their looks all day.”
- “I don’t want people to think that I’m shallow because I look too good.”
- “I don’t want people to flirt with me because I’m married, and I don’t want my husband to think that I’m trying to cheat on him by being flirtatious.”
- “I want people to focus on me, not my looks.”
- “I have bigger things to worry about than how I look.
- “I don’t have enough time to give myself a make-over every day.”
- “I’m just going to get old and fall apart anyhow, so why bother?”
- “I’m not going to lose the weight anyhow, so why bother?”
- Recognize the Contradictions
Every excuse has a contradiction in itself. For every excuse, write down how your excuse actually defeats itself.- Excuse: “I want people to focus on me, not my looks.”
Contradiction: “People tend to ignore unattractive people, so people wouldn’t focus on me much at all, let alone my looks.” - Excuse: “I don’t want people to think that I’m shallow because I look too good.”
Contradiction: “People are more likely to think that I am in control of my life and know what I want rather than shallow. If I don’t try to look my best, they’ll just think that I have no self-respect nor respect for others since I don’t try to look good for them either.”
- Excuse: “I want people to focus on me, not my looks.”
